New Year's Kickin' Eve
A bit late on this, but hopefully it's aged like fine wine, rather than moldy bread.
Every neighbourhood has its own socio-economic weak link. This blog aims to chronicle the misadventures of Double Wide, the weak link trailer trash who lives across the street from me. He airs his dirty laundry, so I report it.
A bit late on this, but hopefully it's aged like fine wine, rather than moldy bread.
It's been a quiet summer here in Outer Doublewidistan. Lord Double Wide hasn't been seen much the last couple months. He shows up once a week for a short stretch then takes off again. Halfway house for the criminally stupid?
I'm working in my office, which faces Doublewidinavia. Little Dick is home, the front door is (duh) wide open. Double Wide pulls up on his bike and yells out, "Cornhole!" I'm sure the real story behind what that means isn't as entertaining as what most people's imagination can conjure up. Nevertheless, conjure away, faithful reader.
I feel bad. Literally a half dozen of you rely on my news and analysis regarding the sovereign nation of Doublewidistan, yet I have provided no news or analysis. I could blame the Doublewidistani people themselves, but I don't blame monkeys for eating bugs out of each others fur or hurling their poo, so there is a principle to uphold. So, to repeat, I feel bad.
Friends, I regret to tell you that the Double Wide Chicken Coop and Dog Enclosure 9000™ is gone. Like Hitler's claim of a thousand-year reich, its longevity was overstated. In the last couple days, an older guy (were I to guess, the landlord) and a few younger ones have been cleaning up the front yard and doing some repairs—and took down the Coop. Likewise, Double Wide and his Hoochie Mama haven't been around for the last four (nor has Little Dick and his Shiny Scratchfree Truck). Does this mean that DW is on his way out, or is already out? We didn't see any stuff being hauled out, so that would suggest no. But given the timing of everything—end of the month, just before classes start—it's suggestive. I hope DW comes back for Kitty!, tho, who's just been hanging around these past few days. Similarly, the DW/DWD pillow is just lying on the front steps, waiting for someone to tan on …