Monday, January 05, 2009

New Year's Kickin' Eve

A bit late on this, but hopefully it's aged like fine wine, rather than moldy bread.

Around 12.30 am on New Year's Eve (or New Year's Day, if you want to get technical), I'm at the back of our house, and I can hear banging outside. So I go to the front window and see someone at the Doublewidistan embassy kicking the fuck out of the front door and yelling. I don't want it to go unnoticed that the sound carried the forty-some yards between the houses, through our windows, and another fifteen or so yards within our house, and loud enough that we both noticed and went to check it out.

Okay, so someone's kicking the front door. Not sure if it's a resident or a friend. I don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but I think there's only one set of keys for the Wheelless Trailer because, coming and going, the residents leave and grab keys from the mailbox. But the house was completely dark and no cars were around, so I would guess that they were out for the night. I deduced it pretty quickly. The Door Kicker, however, kicked and yelled for (no exaggeration) five minutes (I checked the clock) before giving up and going around to the back. No idea what happened after that—did he get in? did he go away? did he die in the snow?—because I went to bed. 

17 Comments:

At 12:48 PM, Blogger Wolter said...

If it weren't for the fact that no one would ever clean up the body, thus leaving a smell at spring thaw, I would be rooting for "frozen to death in the snow."

Once I scan the note I got, I will probably be putting up a piece about my shitty neighbors soon.

 
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At 12:37 PM, Blogger The Chronicler said...

I know this blog is a few years old, but I've bookmarked it as an example of a truly bad-ass entertaining writing style! Better than a lot of books/blogs I've skimmed on average. You've got some great phrases and descriptions that stick in readers' minds, great job! And these people across your street--I think we know where the trashy talk shows pick their guests: from this population demographic.

My only suggestion would be to activate Akismet or similar to clean up the comment spam; there seems to be a lot going on here.
Cheers.

 
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